Noble Savages and Babies without Diapers

I've written before on the "noble savage" meme, such as the "Death by New Age" incident.

Thus, the oppressed non-whites and their noble savage wisdom must possess truths not readily available to the privileged Westerners. Further, the stodgy portrayal of Western science, with its empirical testing and data, speaks to a coldness perpetrated by an oppressive white ruling class. Contrastingly, the non-whites possess an exotic quality closer to the spiritual basis of man, not besmirched by the racist, classist, and sexist West.

Another recent instance of this phenomenon is the increased popularity of bare-foot running. This desire to live "naturally", a purposefully ambiguous term that roughly corresponds to an amalgamation of Gaiaism, New Age, and implicit multiculturalism, stems from a liberal rejection of Western norms. The non-Western norms of the noble savage, the mystical creation of Western sociology professors, gain credence. As I say above, the noble savage doesn't engage in the deleterious activities of the oppressive Western classes. While some use this idealism as justification for vegetarianism or marathon running, others take it a bit further. Notice even the Slate.com writer finds this proposition inane.

My partner and I are adopting twins! We plan to raise them without diapers. There's a method for this, and most of the world goes without diapers. We will also use only organic clothes and linens, and only natural wooden toys. I'm wondering how we can politely express this to the people attending our baby shower. It would seem a bit brash to simply tack a list of what we don't want to the bottom of the invitation. I'm afraid that giving no indication about our organic preferences would lead to us throwing out or giving away almost all of the gifts we receive, and that doesn't seem right, either.

Prudence responds in a classic sardonic tone, even mocking their extreme environmentalism.

It's true that there are swaths of the world—largely in rural Africa and Asia—where children go undiapered. However, in those places it's accepted that elimination means squat-and-go. (And I have the feeling that the villagers, given the choice, would take three years' worth of Pampers over a lifetime of carbon credits.)

The first time you take your undiapered duo to Whole Foods and they let fly on the organic arugula, the produce manager will communicate about eliminating you as a customer. I'm also trying to imagine the condition the twins will be in as you attempt to transport them from crib to car to grocery cart. As the mother of one, I'm here to tell you parenthood is hard enough without committing yourself to having your twins (twins!) defecate on your hemp clothing every time you pick them up. As for the baby shower, go ahead and register at Holier Than Thou Baby and have the host put out the word about your gift preferences.

This is an illustrative example of how ideology often trumps pragmatism (also a blight on mainstream conservatism). The proposed rationale for this downright stupid choice is mentioning how these "other cultures" do it. See that's it; other cultures do it, so it must be good. They also kill albinos for their body parts. Perhaps, they'll write Prudence about that next week.

[OT question: Are the general length of my posts about right or a little long?]